March 19, 2020

Did you change your spring break plans because of the virus? From what to what?

Yes, I was supposed to be returning home to the Rio Grande Valley. Considering how that would be six hours of driving, stopping at gas stations where contamination could occur, I and my family decided against me returning home.

How did you feel when you were informed the remainder of the semester would be held online?

In a word…devastated. I realize how expensive our school is (even though my expenses are paid through scholarships) and it is expensive because of the sort of programs of education that we receive. As a private liberal arts school, our classes aren’t like ordinary classes at other universities. I’ve been so used to the intimate classroom setting and the experimental teachings of our lovely professors, now it seems like all of that money is going to waste. What’s even worse is that none of us got to say goodbye. I’m close with friends on campus that aren’t even from Austin and who won’t be staying in Austin. I’m close with professors whom I’ll only be able to see via video chats now. It’s all quite saddening and lonely. While this isolation is understandable and necessary, it doesn’t change how devastated I was to hear that the normality of my junior year would be ending quite abruptly.

Where will you be living while courses are held online? Is this a change from usual?

Like usual, I will be living in my off campus apartment here in Austin. The only change is that I won’t be able to return home for even short visits until months from now (I’m originally from McAllen and only moved to Austin to attend St. Ed’s).

What has been your experience with moving classes online? What’s good? What’s not so good?

Well, as a Literature major, I’m quite concerned for the fate of my courses. While all of the Writ and Lit professors are outstanding geniuses within their fields, they don’t do so well with technology (I should know, I’ve helped many of the professors I’m close with navigate Canvas over the past few years). Again, St. Ed’s is a mostly Socratic oriented campus. Moving to online changes things in that our organic class discussions are now turning into regular lectures where we get sent videos of our professors teaching us about subjects rather than the conversations we’re used to having in class. It’s hard to discuss literature, which requires organic discussion, when we all have to have our mics muted during Zoom meetings so that no one talks over anyone else or for fear that we’ll have feedback due to background noise. The entire situation is not ideal and, as a person who absolutely despises technology, I absolutely hate everything about moving to online classes. I do, however, see that it is necessary in order to preserve the safety of everyone in the St. Ed’s community.

How has the virus (and the precautions taken to prevent it spreading) impacted your daily life?

Well, considering how the only thing the American government has said to do is wash our hands, don’t touch our faces, and practice social distancing/self-isolation…I’d say my life is pretty impacted. No one really knows what this virus is or how to stop it as of right now and that has made everyone go a little crazy. Grocery stores are completely empty. I saw a full out brawl break out in an HEB between a group of men fighting over the last carton of eggs. Due to the lack of education and the minimal precautions taken by our government, American society has gone a bit nuts lately. Myself, I’ve been in self-isolation and haven’t stepped foot outside of my apartment for seven days straight now. I’m a person who usually doesn’t like to go out and do things anyway, but I do have BPD (Borderline Personality Disorder) that gives me tremendous bouts of depression. I’d usually go out and socialize for a little bit at school, maybe see a movie with a friend or shop at the mall with my mom…but social distancing has made it so that ‘socializing’ isn’t really possible. Because of this, my mental health has taken a terrible down turn and I’m honestly concerned for myself and for the entire community of mental illness sufferers. These are trying times, and usually people band together during trying times. It’s really hard to figure out what to do when you can’t even band together because doing so would make the problem you’re trying to console each other about much worse.

How worried are you about getting the virus?

Extremely….I was born a sick baby and have always had an extremely poor respiratory system, plus I’ve had close calls with pneumonia when I was younger. This is why I’m taking the social distancing/self-isolation initiative so seriously.

Do you know anyone who has gotten COVID-19?

No I do not, however, I do have a friend who studied abroad this semester in Angers, France. He currently just got out of quarantine without testing positive for the virus. He is still stranded in Paris right now and has no idea how he’s getting back to the states which leaves him exposed to the possibility of contracting the virus the longer he stays there. (St. Ed’s had also recently taken the Angers students to visit Rome….so he was also at risk there in Italy).

Are you staying in? What are you doing to pass the time?

Yes, I’m obviously staying in. I’m the Editor-in-Chief and President of two student publications on campus so I’ve just been working all week. I’ve been editing, sending correspondence emails, communicating with designers for digital formatting, and keeping in contact with our printers to plan our next moves for publication. Today, March 19th, is actually the first day that I have no work to do and I’m already kind of getting antsy. Seeing other people’s Instagram stories is making me want to do some puzzles too. Maybe I’ll watch some anime, prepare some course work for after our extended Spring Break ends….maybe this would actually be a great opportunity to continue working on some novels and poetry I’ve been writing. I’ll probably just spend my days watching TV, reading, writing, and video chatting with friends and family. I’m honestly just trying to stay sane while being locked in like this.

Are you going out? Where do you go and what is it like?

I’ve only been out once (before my seven day isolation) to HEB and that’s when I saw the brawl break out. I immediately finished paying for my groceries and left. I haven’t left my apartment since. I will say that the roads are absolutely dead (which, for Austin and its usual crazy traffic, is super eerie).

Is there anything else you’d like to tell us about what you’re feeling or experiencing right now?

It’s hard to put into words just how terrifying all of this is and also how panic-calm everyone is. Nothing’s really happening, like this isn’t some zombie apocalypse where everyone’s fighting for their lives and life is completely disrupted. Minus going outdoors, my life is fairly normal-ish. And yet, this weird calm while deaths are happening and zero information is known about this virus, makes me more terrified than if this actually were some highly dramatic zombie apocalypse. These are weird times. We all made jokes back in January about how everyone thought the world would end in 2000 and then again in 2012 and just how stupid we all were back then. We joked about how there’s been an epidemic/pandemic during 1720, 1820, and 1920…what if it happened again this year in 2020 (lol). “What if?” we said. Little did we know that this whole thing would blow up and would realize that joke that we didn’t actually mean. I’m sure we’ll get through this, find a cure, help people recover…but we’re losing people now and our lives are being disrupted now. It’s great that people are still trying to stay positive by looking to the future and maybe it’s just my depression talking, but I’m living in the now, not the future. And the now sucks! I can’t have a positive outlook in the now. I really really wish this would all just go away or I could just disappear. We shall see what comes later. I’ll keep watching from isolation.