Nothing sees the world like my eyes. This observation fascinated me as a child, and it fascinates me today. No person, no thing, nothing sees what I see. Photography provided the closest means I could find to share what I saw in the world. The more I worked with cameras, though, the more I realized they also could not convey my vision completely.

I prefer to shoot with black and white film. The process feels more tangible to me. There are no colors to complicate or distort. Color does nothing for me. Rather, it gets in the way of the true message of the photograph. Black and white images are stripped down to what is truly important: the shapes, the spaces, the lightness, and the darkness. In my mind, colors serve the purpose of distracting…as if to distract the viewer from delving deeper into the photograph. Colors can block deep emotions that a photograph might evoke in the viewer and only feed into the superficial emotions.

Not only do I feel as if the colors get in the way but that the world itself inhibits my ability to record what I see around me. I do not buy into the theory that the camera is trying to control what I do and see, but I feel as if the world is trying to keep me from showing what I see. The world holds a secret and I have seen that secret and I keep trying to share it with those around me, but my attempt is foiled every time. The world conspires against me and the camera – when the camera loses focus because the sun is too bright or a glorious moment is fleeting and gone – to guard its secrets. If anything, the camera is an ally trying to help me in my quest, but it simply falls short.

In theory, I would trust all art to my hands and mind only, but even then my hands fail me. My mind sees clearly what I want to portray, but my hands are not skilled enough or disciplined enough to create what my mind wants it to. With this struggle I turn to the camera, knowing all too well its limitations in my hands.

I am not naive enough to believe that I am the only artist struggling with sharing what I see with the world. This same frustration must be, and must have been, a universal experience for anyone wishing to convey their particular artistic vision with those around them. As I strive to overcome the limitations of my own hands and my chosen medium, I share a kinship with those who also “see it.”