It’s been a long time since I came home to Germany in July. I knew I needed to write something, but in between readjusting to being home, starting school again, and being at a complete loss of words for how best to sum it all up, I have put it off far too long.
My last few weeks in Germany were fantastic. There were many difficult goodbyes in Koblenz, and I almost couldn’t pack everything up for all the various goodbye parties and dinners. But at last, I boarded a train to Frankfurt and picked my parents up at the airport there. I can’t describe how happy I was to finally see them after almost 7 months away! They were so tired after their flight and all I wanted to do was talk endlessly and proudly show them what had become my home.
We made a whirlwind tour through Germany, and I didn’t update because we either didn’t have internet or I was too tired after the trek to write anything. But we saw everything–Dad drove us on the Autobahn from Koblenz to Heidelberg, Ulm, Schwangau and Neuschwanstein, Munich, Chiemsee, Rothenberg, Wurzburg, and Nuremberg. We saw castles and had lunch on Zugspitze in the Alps. I showed them things that I had discovered on my own and played tour guide at Neuschwanstein. Somehow they got tired of all the Ludwig II castles in Bavaria (perhaps my enthusiasm was a bit too much). We visited new things–Nuremberg is a new favorite city of mine; it was gorgeous and the castle there was different than any other I’d visited. Plus I finally made sense of the confusing history of the Holy Roman Empire thanks to that tour. In the end, it was difficult to leave. Let’s just say I practically had to be dragged onto the plane back in Frankfurt.
But that’s the thing: hardly anybody emphasizes how very difficult it is to readjust to life back in your home country. It’s Nobember–a good 4 months since I returned–and I’m still making that adjustment. The best way I can describe it is that it was like being tuned into the wrong radio station, that one just in between stations where you’re hearing two things at once and often with a great deal of static. Sometimes you hear the right station but you have a hard time making out what’s going on. That’s pretty much how my first week of classes were.
Initially some things were more difficult to adjust to than others. Hearing English–and Spanish–all the time was weird. I actually hadn’t heard much Spanish since I left the US so that was strange to see all the signs printed in Spanish and people speaking it everywhere. Huge stores and seeing giant expanses of nothing from the road. That’s weird. Strangely, nothing looked new. It was like I hadn’t left. But I could tell that I was different and that was odd. I must have offended quite a few people when they’d try to talk to me in public because I still operated under the assumption that strangers don’t speak to one another and it took me some time to notice people were talking to me! A lot of things were just as I left them. But the bigger impact past the first few weeks has been surprising.
7 months is a long time to live in a new place alone. I learned that if I could manage that, I could essentially live anywhere I wanted to and do anything with my future that I desired because I could not only survive it, but I would probably adapt and enjoy it. I’m not afraid of moving to go to grad school, and I actually like the possibility that I could someday move to a foreign country. It takes strength to stay abroad, but it builds even more by the time you’re done.
I’ve also gained new cultural perspectives that were impossible to get back home. Even western cultures have fundamental differences, and learning about those (often in unexpected ways) makes you question whether what you always accepted as “the way things are done” is really the only way to do things. (Hint: it’s not.) That’s not to say one is right and the other is wrong, but one might be better or worse for you personally. For instance, in Germany there are laws governing when stores can be open. Generally, everything shuts down on Sunday so that people can spend time with their families. Places also close a lot earlier over there (good luck eating after 8:00 pm). Is that better than our 24/7 culture? Subjectively, I’d say yes, because it gives people the time they need to spend with those that really matter to them (yes, people matter more than things.) It’s mandatory down-time, something that I really benefited from because I’m a workaholic. I’d have benefited from it even more if my family had lived there. But the point I’m trying to make is that perhaps what we take for granted as the way we ought to do things isn’t the only way to do them; there are alternatives which may actually be better for some people. It’s really interesting.
On that note, it’s hard not to mark one culture as better or worse than the other. The study abroad office warned us about this, and they were right: that’s a real challenge. That’s why, over these last few months, I’ve realized that one culture isn’t better or worse, but one might be better or worse for me, and not necessarily as a whole, but little parts on their own. I miss little things about Germany. Relaxing more and still getting things done, Biergarten culture where people don’t give you dirty looks for drinking a beer (and where the main goal isn’t always to get drunk), and public transport to name a few. On the other hand, I’m glad to have my family and friends back here. I love St. Edward’s and our faculty here, and even though I’m more sensitive than ever to our intense workloads, I really like this style of education.
On a whole, study abroad was an incredible experience and I strongly recommend it to anyone who is considering it. I miss Germany–it is like a second home to me, and I will be going back when I get a chance. I am still in awe of all the other places I got to see and the people that I got to meet. It hasn’t been long enough to say that study abroad is a life changing experience (although I believe it is), but I can say this: you won’t come back the same person. You’ll have changed and grown in so many ways.
And before I close this entry out, there’s something I have to say to anyone studying abroad in Germany:
PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE look up their trash and recycling systems before you go there. Trust me. They’re complicated and you can actually break the law for doing it wrong. Not that they’ll come after you until you’ve done that for a while but still, be acquainted with their laws. There are many.
Speak what German you know whenever you can. They’ll graciously switch to English but appreciate the effort. Don’t be shy. Establish a half English/half German rule with a friend to improve language skills for both of you.
Finally, don’t be afraid to travel. Go anywhere and everywhere. Go alone if you can’t find anyone who wants to come with you. Take a camera and backup batteries. Take a good book and read it on the train because you’ll learn a little from someone else’s adventures while having your own. Do things for the experience. Go to mass in the Cologne Cathedral because you can, even if you’re not religious. Stick around when you see a festival. Keep an open mind and open eyes because you never know what you’ll see and what you’ll learn.
